Given my day job (and personality), it can sometimes be challenging to keep quiet, but I agree wholeheartedly with every point you make. Use it.ĭear Old-fashioned: I have a Post-it over my desk saying, “Unsolicited advice is always self-serving.” There’s a very old-fashioned quality called tact. Unsolicited opinions, like “constructive criticism,” are rude, unnecessary and sometimes hurtful. If you don’t approve of an unplanned pregnancy, the name chosen for your new grandchild, the choice of clothing, the color of anything, or the choice of what vegetable your friend wants for dinner, keep your mouth shut. I am constantly amazed (appalled?) at the comments people make about other people’s lives. When someone is suffering, simply having a calm, stalwart, and undemanding companion can help a lot.ĭear Amy: There’s an old saying that goes: “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” Make their hardship or suffering about you or your own experience.ĭo: Be natural, compassionate, and adopt a listening stance. Tell someone that God or the universe won’t give them more than they can handle. ![]() We haven’t changed a bit!”Ĭompare one person’s illness or loss to another person’s. “I just found this picture of us from high school. “I made some soup are you OK if I drop off a container?” “Can I drive you to your treatment next week?” “I’m just checking in … I’m thinking about you so often. “Oh no! I’m really sorry you’re going through this.” Where can I find more eloquent speech for these unfortunate situations?ĭear Tongue Tied: Hang eloquence. I’m sympathetic and want to offer words of comfort, but most of what I can think of to say is stilted, shallow and sounds insincere to me – even as I’m saying it. Talking further with a calm and mutually compassionate attitude might help to reveal what is really amiss.ĭear Amy: I’ve reached the age when more and more people I care about are sick, ailing or dying. I agree that because this behavior was so outside the norm for her, there might be an underlying medical, hormonal, or emotional trigger. She should also be asked to understand how hurtful it is to absorb such a serious, unfounded and unfair accusation. Your wife may admit to having long-standing suspicions and insecurity about this previous work relationship. Resolving a challenge is the opposite from pretending it never happened. Your wife is embarrassed by her own behavior of course she doesn’t want to discuss it further!īut I agree with you that it is important that you two discuss this in order to come to a resolution that will satisfy both of you. For I decided to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ and him crucified.Dear Baffled: Your wife reacted in a way that was irrational and unprecedented in your relationship. For while I was with y And I, when I came to you, brothers, did not come proclaiming to you the testimony of God with lofty speech or wisdom. For I determined not to know anything among you except Jesus Christ and And when I came to you, brothers and sisters, proclaiming to you the testimony of God, I did not come with superiority of speech or of wisdom [no lofty words of e My brothers and sisters, when I first came to proclaim to you the secrets of God, I refused to come as an expert, trying to impress you with my eloquent speech and lofty wisdom. For I resolved to know nothing while I wa And I, brethren, when I came to you, did not come with excellence of speech or of wisdom declaring to you the testimony of God. When I came to you, I did not come with eloquence or human wisdom as I proclaimed to you the testimony about God. For I determined not to know anything among you, save Jesus Christ, and And so it was with me, brothers and sisters. ![]() I decided that while I was with you I would forget about everything exc And I, brethren, when I came unto you, came not with excellency of speech or of wisdom, proclaiming to you the testimony of God. ![]() For I determined not to know any thing among you, save Jesus Christ, and Dear brothers and sisters, when I came to you, I did not come preaching God’s secret with fancy words or a show of human wisdom. For I decided that while I was with you I would forget everything exc And I, brethren, when I came to you, came not with excellency of speech or of wisdom, declaring unto you the testimony of God. For I determined to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ, and H When I first came to you, dear brothers and sisters, I didn’t use lofty words and impressive wisdom to tell you God’s secret plan. I deliberately kept it plain And when I came to you, brethren, I did not come with superiority of speech or of wisdom, proclaiming to you the testimony of God. 1 Corinthians 2:1-5 You’ll remember, friends, that when I first came to you to let you in on God’s sheer genius, I didn’t try to impress you with polished speeches and the latest philosophy.
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